ACCUSATION, false
John was driving home late one night when he picked up a hitchhiker. As they rode
along, he began to be suspicious of his passenger. John checked to see if his wallet was
safe in the pocket of his coat that was on the seat between them, but it wasn't there! So
he slammed on the brakes, ordered the hitchhiker out, and said, "Hand over the wallet
immediately!" The frightened hitchhiker handed over a billfold, and John drove off.
When he arrived home, he started to tell his wife about the experience, but she
interrupted him, saying, "Before I forget, John, do you know that you left your
wallet at home this morning?"
Our Daily Bread, October 2, 1992.
One of the saddest and scariest stories I've ever heard was about a young evangelist.
He was just barely 21, on fire for God, effective in his preaching and soul-winning, and
in great demand from local churches. He had preached several large crusades and was soon
invited to an area-wide effort at which he would be the main speaker. Though he was not
yet even out of college, he was a protégé of international evangelist, Sammy
Tippit, and
was admired and considered wise. Though he didn't have a steady girlfriend, he dated
regularly at Bible college. Spiritually he was alert and mature. He was, however, naive.
The first night of the crusade he headed up the counseling ministry in a large room near
the pastor's study. A beautiful teen-ager asked if she could speak with him personally. He
tried to assign her to someone else, but when she persisted, he agreed for her to wait
until he was finished with the others. More than an hour after the meeting had ended, the
rest of the counselors and counselees had left, and he was alone with the young girl. A
few minutes later she burst from the room, screaming, "He made a pass at me! He
wanted to make love to me!" That very night the pastor of the host church and a small
group of the crusade planners confronted the young preacher and demanded an explanation.
He denied the girl's charge but had no witnesses. The girl had seemed an upstanding young
woman in the church, and there was no reason to disbelieve her story.
"What did happen in that room?" the pastor demanded. "To tell you that
would to be to make an accusation behind someone's back," he said. "Which is
what happened to me. I ask only that I be allowed to face my accuser." The pastor and
the others canceled the rest of the crusade and agreed that the young woman should be
asked to face the preacher in their presence. Two nights later she showed up with her
parents at a private board meeting. The pastor asked if she would care to speak about her
charges against the preacher. "She has already said all she has to say, "her
father said sternly, her mother nodding and glaring at the accused. "Would you, son
care to share your version of what happened in that room the other night?" "No,
sir," the evangelist said. "I see no future in that. Only she and I know the
truth, and I cannot defend myself. I'd just like to say this to her. Cindy, you know what
happened and what didn't happen in that room. If you don't tell the truth, I will be
branded and may never preach again. This will damage my reputation and that of this
church, and even that of God. If I did what you say I did, I deserve no better, but we
both know that is not the truth. I'm begging you in the name of Christ to set the record
straight." The silence hung heavy as the board and her parents watched her face
contort into a grimace before the tears began to flow. "I lied," she said
quietly. "I'm sorry. I lied. He didn't make a pass at me; I made a pass at him. When he
turned me down I was so embarrassed and ashamed and angry that I made up that story. I'm
so sorry!"
Jerry Jenkins, Hedges, 1989, Wolgemuth & Hyatt, pp 76-78.
ACQUAINTANCE
A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
Ambrose Bierce.
The difference between a friend and an acquaintance is that a friend helps; an
acquaintance merely advises.
"Calgary Bob" Edwards.
ACTION
Several years ago, I heard the story of Larry Walters, a 33-year-old man who decided he
wanted to see his neighborhood from a new perspective. He went down to the local army
surplus store one morning and bought forty-five used weather balloons. That afternoon he
strapped himself into a lawn chair, to which several of his friends tied the now
helium-filled balloons. He took along a six-pack of beer, a peanut-butter-and-jelly
sandwich, and a BB gun, figuring he could shoot the balloons one at a time when he was
ready to land.
Walters, who assumed the balloons would lift him about 100 feet in the air, was caught
off guard when the chair soared more than 11,000 feet into the sky -- smack into the
middle of the air traffic pattern at Los Angeles International Airport. Too frightened to
shoot any of the balloons, he stayed airborne for more than two hours, forcing the airport
to shut down its runways for much of the afternoon, causing long delays in flights from
across the country.
Soon after he was safely grounded and cited by the police, reporters asked him three
questions:
"Where you scared?" "Yes." "Would you do it again?" "No." "Why did you do it?" "Because," he said, "you can't just sit there."
Leadership, Summer 1993, p. 35.
Dr. J.B. Gambrel tells an amusing story from General Stonewall Jackson's famous valley
campaign. Jackson's army found itself on one side of a river when it needed to be on the
other side. After telling his engineers to plan and build a bridge so the army could
cross, he called his wagon master in to tell him that it was urgent the wagon train cross
the river as soon as possible. The wagon master started gathering all the logs, rocks and
fence rails he could find and built a bridge. Long before day light General Jackson was
told by his wagon master all the wagons and artillery had crossed the river. General
Jackson asked where are the engineers and what are they doing? The wagon master's only
reply was that they were in their tent drawing up plans for a bridge.
Pulpit Helps, May,
1991.
ACTION
Several years ago, I heard the story of Larry Walters, a 33-year-old man who decided he
wanted to see his neighborhood from a new perspective. He went down to the local army
surplus store one morning and bought forty-five used weather balloons. That afternoon he
strapped himself into a lawn chair, to which several of his friends tied the now
helium-filled balloons. He took along a six-pack of beer, a peanut-butter-and-jelly
sandwich, and a BB gun, figuring he could shoot the balloons one at a time when he was
ready to land.
Walters, who assumed the balloons would lift him about 100 feet in the air, was caught
off guard when the chair soared more than 11,000 feet into the sky -- smack into the
middle of the air traffic pattern at Los Angeles International Airport. Too frightened to
shoot any of the balloons, he stayed airborne for more than two hours, forcing the airport
to shut down its runways for much of the afternoon, causing long delays in flights from
across the country.
Soon after he was safely grounded and cited by the police, reporters asked him three
questions:
"Where you scared?" "Yes." "Would you do it again?" "No." "Why did you do it?" "Because," he said, "you can't just sit there."
Leadership, Summer 1993, p. 35.
Dr. J.B. Gambrel tells an amusing story from General Stonewall Jackson's famous valley
campaign. Jackson's army found itself on one side of a river when it needed to be on the
other side. After telling his engineers to plan and build a bridge so the army could
cross, he called his wagon master in to tell him that it was urgent the wagon train cross
the river as soon as possible. The wagon master started gathering all the logs, rocks and
fence rails he could find and built a bridge. Long before day light General Jackson was
told by his wagon master all the wagons and artillery had crossed the river. General
Jackson asked where are the engineers and what are they doing? The wagon master's only
reply was that they were in their tent drawing up plans for a bridge.
Pulpit Helps, May,
1991.
ADDICTION
Alan Lang, in his "Substance Abuse and Habitual Behavior" report to the
National Academy of Science, identifies nine such characteristics: Impulsive behavior,
Difficulty in delaying gratification, Sensation seeking, Antisocial personality,
Nonconformist values, Sense of alienation, Deviant behavior, Heightened feelings of
stress, Little regard for goals generally valued by society.
Alan Lang, "Substance Abuse and Habitual
Behavior".
ADMIRATION
A young couple who had just witnessed a Bill Cosby performance went backstage hoping to
get the comedian's autograph in their newly born son's baby book. An aide took the book to
Cosby, and when it was returned the couple excitedly looked for his signature. They
couldn't find it, and they left the theater disappointed. Days later, however, the mother
found it on one of the inside pages. Under "Baby's first sentence" was written
"I like Bill Cosby."
Bits & Pieces, April 28, 1994, pp. 19-20.
Back in 1934, when the Cunard line was getting ready to name its greatest ocean liner,
the consensus was that it should be named after Queen Elizabeth I. A high official is
reported to have had an audience with King George V. "We would like to name the ship
after England's greatest queen," he told the king. "Well," said King
George, "I shall have to ask her." The ship was promptly named Queen Mary.
Bits & Pieces, October 17, 1991.
ADULTERY
Long ago Demosthenes had written: "We keep prostitutes for pleasure; we keep
mistresses for the day to day needs of the body; we keep wives for the begetting of
children and for the faithful guardianship of our homes. So long as a man supported his
wife and family there was no shame whatsoever in extra- marital affairs."
C. Swindoll, Sanctity of Life, Word, 1990, p. 62.
I am steadfastly for monogamy. Adultery is almost certainly going to make a dent in
trust and intimacy, and in many cases I've known, it has destroyed them altogether. A
woman who is conducting a secret affair has to become deliberately deceitful...like a CIA
agent or spy. She can't just come home and spill forth the events of her day. She's got to
think, What can I safely talk about, and what have I got to keep to myself? So even when
the infidelity isn't discovered, it changes who you are. A person goes from being a
candid, open human being to a secretive, hidden one.
Bernie Zilbergeld, Homemade, November, 1989.
Hite of Folly. Sensationalistic sex surveys suffered further damage with the release of
new research on the fidelity of American spouses. According to a new study by Tom W. Smith
of the National Opinion Research Center, roughly 15 percent of married or previously
married Americans have committed adultery. The results largely agree with the 1987 ABC
News/Washington Post poll that found 89 percent of spouses faithful. Pop culture gurus
Kinsey (37 percent of men), Joyce Brothers (50 percent of women), and Shire Hite (75
percent of women married 5 years) have stoked reports of rampant infidelity.
Family
Research Council, Washington Watch, October 29, 1993, p. 2.
The sexual revolution notwithstanding, nearly all married couples are monogamous, two
new sex surveys say. A university of Washington, Seattle, study in October's American
Journal of Public Health found 94 percent of married couples had one partner in the
previous year. Likewise, a survey by the National Opinion Research Center in Chicago
determined that only about 4 percent of married people had sexual partners other than
their spouse during a one-year span. Overall, infidelity has been practiced by only 21
percent of men and 13 percent of women, according to the survey. The studies dispute data
by such investigators as the Kinsey Institute of Sex Research and author Shere Hite, who
have suggested anywhere from one-third to three-fourths of married couples cheat on their
mates. "There probably are more scientifically worthless 'facts' on extramarital
relations than any other facet of human behavior," says Tom W. Smith of the National
Opinion Research Center. Smith says adultery is more prevalent among younger people, urban
dwellers, and unchurched, and the previously divorced.
Christianity Today, November 22,
1993, p. 42.
A large majority of men--married and single--say they wouldn't have an affair, even if
they were certain their loved one would never find out, says a Gallup poll commissioned by
Self magazine, in the June (1992) issue. Of 500 men surveyed, 67% of married men and 60%
of unmarried men say an affair is absolutely out of the question. Only 5% of married men
and 11% of unmarried men would do it (the rest said maybe). Also, 95% of married men say
they wouldn't drop their partner for a trophy wife if they became extremely successful or
wealthy.
U.S.A. Today, May 26, 1992, p. D1.
The major factor contributing to extramarital relationships is physical and emotional
attraction (78 percent), far outdistancing marital dissatisfaction (41 percent).
How
Common is Pastoral Indiscretion?, Leadership, Winter, 1988, p. 12-13.
It was reported today (7-24-90) in the news that former PTL leader and TV evangelist
Jim Bakker, now jailed for various fund- raising improprieties, makes eleven cents an hour
cleaning toilets in the penitentiary. And a federal judge ruled that the little money he
has accumulated could be seized to pay penalties he owes of over $500,000. His empire
crumbled when he had an adulterous relationship with Jessica Hahn.
David Hocking, The Moral Catastrophe, Harvest House, 1990, p. 64ff.
There is a direct correlation between age at loss of virginity and having an affair
later in life. In women who have their first sexual relationship at age 21, or later,
cheating occurs with only 16%. But for those who have their first sexual relationship at a
younger age, up to 50% cheat on a future mate.
Homemade, Vol. 10, No. 7, quoted from
Female Sexuality.
Dr. Donald Granvold, a professor at the Univ. of Texas at Arlington, surveyed 262
marriage counselors. 22% thought marriages are jeopardized when the wife has an affair,
while only 2% thought marriages are in trouble when the husband has an affair. 40% of the
counselors he surveyed admitted that they themselves had had extramarital experiences.
(1985)
Dr. Donald Granvold.
ADVANTAGE
One of the golfers on the pro tour some years ago was a pompous egomaniac with the
emotional maturity of a six-year-old. He could do nothing wrong and always had a quick
excuse for any loss: it was a lousy course, the other golfers were cheating, the weather
was terrible, etc. As if these faults were not enough, he was also not above hustling a
few extra dollars playing amateurs in cities on the tour for $50 a hole.
One day he was approached by a man wearing dark glasses and carrying a white cane who
offered to play him for $100 a hole. "Why, I can't play you," the professional
protested. "You're blind, aren't you?" "Yes, I am," replied the man.
"But that's all right. I was a state champion before I went blind. I think I can beat
you." Now the conceited one had not been doing well lately--he needed the money.
Anyway, blind or not, if the guy was crazy enough to challenge him...well, why not?
"You did say $100 a hole?"
The blind man nodded. "Well, all right. It's a deal. But don't say I didn't warn
you--you'll lose your money. When would you like to play?" "Any night at
all," replied the blind man. "Any night at all."
Source Unknown.
ADVERSITY
I'll say this for adversity: people seem to be able to stand it, and that's more than I
can say for prosperity.
Kin Hubbard.
Contrary to what might be expected, I look back on experiences that at the time seemed
especially desolating and painful with particular satisfaction. Indeed, I can say with
complete truthfulness that everything I have learned in my 75 years in this world,
everything that has truly enhanced and enlightened my experience, has been through
affliction and not through happiness.
Malcolm Muggeridge, in Homemade, July, 1990.
1. Problems often provide us with greater opportunities
2. Problems can promote our spiritual maturity (Ps 105:16ff) 3. Problems prove our integrity (1 Pt 3:15) 4. Problems produce a sense of dependence 5. Problems prepare our hearts for ministry (more empathetic)
Source Unknown.
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